Each week our resident gambling addicts, Brooke Costello and Stefan Tornquist, bring you NFL picks.
Our esteemed editor in chief Mr. Austin Kelley celebrated his engagement to Ms. Emily Thompson last weekend, and for that wholly excusable reason was unable to post Stefan’s and my first week picks. And as luck would have it, for the first time ever we both picked every game right. This week we will try to do even better. (Note: You can fact-check Brooke by clicking here. –your esteemed ed.)
Oak @ KC (-3, 38.5)
Brooke: Richard Seymour obviously got a motivational speech from Phillip Seymour Hoffman. He is playing mad, ready to overact, and out to show the league what a huge di$$k Belichek is. KC showed up (at least on the score board) against Baltimore, and should do so again against a lesser foe. One of these teams may surprise out of the West. (Oak ATS and the Over).
ST: I don’t know how KC scored against Baltimore, but they ought to do it again against Oakland at home. Oakland is good for a couple of scores, so long as they don’t clinch the game. (Over and Over Tease w/Philly/NO Over)
N.E. @ NYJ (+3.5, 46)
Brooke: Rex Ryan has his team stirred up, and the first 15 minutes of this could be a Steelers vs Ravens type blood bath. Most of the Patriots best gladiators are gone, and those that remain are all skill players on the offense (Welker, Moss, Brady, and Faulk). It may be a while before the new crop develops the same blood lust. (Jets ATS)
P.S. Bill, Richard Seymour would be a good guy for the Pats to have right now.
ST: Pained as I am, I have to agree with Brooke. I’m astounded by major analysts who still have the Pats at the top of their boards. A weak offensive line and confused if talented D. I suspect they’ll get better as the season goes on, but look for some losses before that happens. They won’t necessarily lose this one, but it’ll be tight as usual. (Jets ATS)
N.O. @ Phi: (-1, 47)
Brooke: I had all kinds of plans for this Sunday’s early game time slot. I was going to water my cactus, do the dishes, eat a sandwich, call my mother, and then mosey down to the bar to watch my Bills. This game ruined all of that. These are the two most entertaining teams in the league right now. Drew Brees has been on a Marino, Fouts, Manning kind of binge the last few years and he is peaking this year. DeSean Jackson and Westbrook need to pick up some slack for the injured McNabb. (NO ATS and Over)
ST: Is this the game? The game when NO does more than beat up on the weak or put pressure on the strong until the 4th quarter, only to allow one more score than they can put up? Maybe in N’Ahlens, but not in Philly. (Philly ATS and the Over as a hedge. Also the Over in any tease that pleases.)
Sea @ SF (-1, 39.5)
Brooke: I predict the winner of this game wins the NFC West this year. Singletary has them playing from start to finish and everything I hear about Patrick Willis makes me think he can be great. It is still hard to see where their points are going to come from. Sea played their last pre-season game last week, and won before half time. They will be rested and ready. (Sea ATS)
ST: I predict that Brooke will make a prediction that takes more sack before the end of the season, which is to say, I agree. Seattle is the team to beat and last I checked (2004) they were pretty good against the run, which is what counts against the Niners. But if they win against Seattle we could be looking at the first team from the West to win 10 games in…well, the last time I checked was 2002. (Sea ATS and the Under)
TB @ Buff (-5, 42)
Brooke: I spoke with my father last night and we talked about really awesome Bills losses. He mentioned Ronnie Harmon dropping a pass in the end zone with no time left against Cleveland. We talked about “Wide Right” and “The Music City Miracle” and each of those was monumental and took place in the playoffs or a Super Bowl. But over the last 3 years the Bills have lost in nearly genius ways during the regular season, and time and again they do it when they have convinced us they will not do it again. Everybody is talking bad about our return guy Leodis McKelvin (one “fan” even defaced his lawn) but Leodis is a home run hitter of a return man. He tries to run them back. That is his training and that is why they pay him the amount they do. So when Dick Jauron or Bobby April sent him in they were getting a guy who does not go down on contact. Jauron consistently puts his players in the position to fail, and his teams do as they have been coached. (Bills ATS)
ST: The game Buffalo played against the Pats had one of two possible outcomes. One, the Bills woke up on Tuesday thinking that they can beat anybody if they keep their cool. Two, the Bills noticed Monday night that the old Gods have forsaken them, and that having a game won doesn’t mean winning it. (TB ATS and the Over)
NYG @ Dal (-3, 44)
Brooke: The Giants D-Line is potentially one of the best units in football and they showed us a taste of that against the very average Skins offense. The Boys offense lit the below average Bucs defense up. The hard thing about week two predictions is you know just enough to be very wrong. I see this as 20-14 either way. This is however a much bigger game for Dallas. (Boys ATS and the Under.)
ST: I’d really like to see Dallas lose at home while inaugurating that new jumbotron, and Brooke’s right – this is a much bigger game for Dallas. But last time I checked, big games were exactly what spooked Tony Romo. I’m giving the nod to the plodding NY offense in a game that doesn’t see too many 60 yard passes. (Gints ATS, Gints and the Under Tease)
Pitt @ Chi (+3, 38)
Pitt ATS, Tease Pitt and Over, Over
If you must bet, take Pitt ATS
Balt @ SD (-3, 40.5)
Balt ATS, Over.
Indy @ Mia (+3, 42)
Under, Indy and the Under teased.
Indy, Under teased with GB.
Stefan’s Tease of the Week: Packers and Titans ATS
Last time I checked(1974) giving up 204 yards to one running back alone, in the 1st half alone, isn’t “good against the run.”
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